same boy you’ve always known


I know you’re out there
and I want you to think
good of me,
but in recent years
time hasn’t been
what it promised to be,
you taught me all
about the good and the bad
when you yourself weren’t sure,
and despite all evidence
to the contrary
my life isn’t as pure

and now I’ve left
your ways, and grown
into something, of my own
I know how you feel
but I’m not the same
boy, you’ve always known.

I know you’re out there
and maybe even
wondering what went wrong,
although it might be true
but we are right
where, we actually belong,
the times we spent
doodling our lives
on the dried canvas of dead leaves,
love me or not
but it wasn’t something
that was meant to be
and now I’ve left
your side, and grown
into something of my own,
you might feel betrayed
but i’m not the same
friend, you’ve always known.

end + begin.


let’s talk about love, she said
her eyes waiting for me
how would you describe it
instead of just letting it be

all of this we’ll talk about
it’s just going to be a memory
it did take a long time to find
but something’s dead in me
we had laughed, we had played
we had leaned on and let in
and then the leaves turned cold
time always at the end, begins.

and the light drained back to
the window it flooded from
we sat in a dark silence
all things about love, gone.

writing blues.


writing poetry is a lot like playing blues music.

it’s definitely about what you say and how you express yourselves. what words you choose, how you phrase them, and what’s the bigger idea, the theme, the feeling behind those words you’re trying to convey.

but even more important thing to keep in mind is what you don’t say.

and this is a big one. poetry is an art form. you’re a performer and your readers are your audience. you are standing up on this stage, singing / playing for them. and what happens when you keep saying a lot of stuff and never stop? or when you keep playing scales after scales and even more on top of it? you lose the soul. you lose the meaning behind your idea you were trying to convey.

because it’s your thoughts, when you put them out by whatever art medium you choose to, you have to give your readers / listeners enough time to process that idea. that’s why what you don’t say and giving them space is so important in writing, music and any art form. and more often than not, you also have to repeat those ideas for a stronger emphasis. that’s why you see repetition of dance steps in a performance, or same lick in a solo more than once.

same techniques can be applied to your writing as well. and no, it’s not easy to just grab a pen and start doing all these things on the go. it takes time. a lot of it. but a start is all you need to get there.

i killed myself yesterday.


I killed myself yesterday.

the sun crept out from behind
the blue lilacs
like flakes of peaks beyond
the cityscape.
my hair started
to rot away at a slow pace
while the vultures flocked
for my remains.

one by one
they took me apart
and safely stole
what was essential to me
almost as if
this was their fate.

to decide my fate.

and they left.
i got up and collected
my remains
the essentials
destined to fate.

little did they know
what is essential is invisible
to the eye.

When someone asked me what inspires me to write


Here’s what I told them:

That’s a good question. I feel this is what everyone struggles with at some point. I know I did. There’s always going to be times when you just sit down to write and nothing comes out on the paper. And we always wonder where and what is our inspiration.

I’m gonna tell you something different here. Inspiration is not real. That one moment when you have the brilliant idea about what to write doesn’t happen in reality. Or it’s way rare than people think it is. Your only inspiration to write should be your why. Why do you wanna write? Why did you start in the first place? That’s it. It’s your why.

Let me give you an example. I started writing long time ago, but I was the most irregular writer ever. And that’s bad. I never knew if I was good or not because I was afraid to show it to anyone. And that made me not wanna continue writing and leave it as just another hobby. But then I thought why I wanna do it. And my why is because where I’m from, no one thinks you can be a writer. No one I knew for a long time ever had a book published. And I know how much of a difference few words can make in someone’s lives. So I told myself, that’s my why. And I kept writing and writing and in few years, I was able to develop this habit of doing it every day even if I don’t feel “inspired” enough.

Make it a habit. Write regularly and put it out in front of people. They decide if you’re good or not. Always. And once you start doing this, you’ll see the magic happen. You won’t need inspiration because that one poem you wrote and someone left a comment on it saying “I really needed this today. Please never stop writing.” That’ll be your lifetime inspiration.

if you’re going to try.


“If you’re going to try, go all the way.
Otherwise, don’t even start.

This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days.
It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation.

Isolation is the gift.
All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds.
And it will be better than anything else you can imagine.

If you’re going to try, go all the way.
There is no other feeling like that.
You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire.
You will ride life straight to perfect laughter.

It’s the only good fight there is.”

— Charles Bukowski