I will wait

it may take longer than usual
or maybe
it will speed up
but when there’s no idea
of what “usual” is
even a moment seems like
forever
eyes keep
glancing at the clock
with seconds ticking away
the whole story
running past me
the hands still sway
left to right
as the time passes
i’ve heard
time heals it all
and when the time has done its job
at the end of the tunnel
where you feel
the light growing on you
that light
will be me
waiting
patiently
for you
for time to do its job
just follow the light
after that
as it leads
to where you’ve always wanted to be
but till then
i will wait
i will wait..

The Buried Life

Often on the dimly lit never ending roads,
in the usual grim alleys of our lives,
we lead on into the dark,
to find those desired sparks and lights,

And often too busy walking through the crowded streets,
if you pause, you’ll notice the strife,
all along the way there was,
the knowledge of our buried life..

a beautiful language

that innocent but confused face,
with those dreamy pair of eyes,
the way they stared with such grace,
of all the things i felt like in haze,
no, they couldn’t have lied.

the deep blue was in a hurry,
but how could i let it run?
her eyes had their own vocabulary,
such magic, it made mine blurry,
what a beautiful language to learn.

for she had eyes and chose me,
can you blame those wonders for that?
even now, when she looks back and sees,
the stars feel so ready to flee,
just don’t blame her, will you, for that.

rain or shine

There was a moment.

There’s always a beautiful moment when this happens. When you look into my eyes after a long time and your smile says it all. When I see you, the world. It stops and all that exists for me, is you and my eyes staring at you. There’s nothing else. No noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tomorrow. The world just stops and it’s a beautiful place and there’s only you. Just you. And my eyes staring at you. When you’re gone, the world starts again and I don’t like it as much as before. I can live in it. I just walk around in it, and wait to see you again and wait for it to stop again. I love it when it stops. It’s  the best thing I’ve ever known or ever felt.

When we have those most unusual conversations in front of everyone where nobody dares to join us, and it’s simple why they don’t. They can never be on the same level as Us together.

You know that. I’m well aware of that.

Every time I have few, but important questions to ask to you, but I never do. Because I know, you won’t answer. You won’t tell the truth. You won’t be honest. Every time this happens, you just leave me with more doubts, and amazing memories, that you know, are as special to you too. You just never express. And by the end of this moment, I start to lose myself, once again, in you.

Every single time.

I can’t help it. But I pretend like nothing happened. But I think you catch that quite easily. Still you don’t say anything. And that’s how we leave. And I end up in my room turning from one side to another on my bed at 4 in the morning trying to figure out where was I wrong? What went wrong when everything was so fucking perfect? I do all kinds of things I promised myself to never do just to take my mind off you. But at the end of the day, all that’s left is my regrets, and the unanswered questions that may always be left unanswered. Forever. The sun seems to never come up and present feels like a distant memory.

But it all changes in that moment. That one beautiful moment. When you look into my eyes and your smile says it all. When it doesn’t matter if there’s rain or shine. And in that moment, there’s no sunset. There’s just now.